Writer, Church leader, Eccentric Nut, Marketer

I'm Church Leader, Writer, Speaker, Marketer, Kindness Project Founder, Broadcaster and Superhero. But most important I'm a Husband, Father and a worshiper of Jesus.

11 December 2007

The ole traditional Church Bachelor Party

Had some public embarrassment, kiss pimpin', bachelor party, fun last night with my friend Matt...

The Christian Bachelor Party. Someone last night made the comment, "so what happens now, does a girl come out and preach?". Oh yeah... we brought Joyce Meyer in.

It's kind of a tough mind-wrap-around. Obviously we've all heard of the stereotypical bachelor parties with strippers or something of the like. One of my friends actually told me of a Christian female shower that brought in a reverse stripper. A guy walked in in shorts and got dressed for them! Ha... THAT'S funny.

Frankly... bachelor parties are a celebration of what the groom is about to experience. And for the young Christian wedders... SEX is a primary.... OK Stop... THE primary thing on their mind when it comes to "the celebration". 5 days before their wedding, the color of the candles on the table, or the holy union of spirits... isn't the first thing on their mind.

So why should Christians exclude it from their celebration? Answer. They shouldn't. I truly enjoyed eating that chocolate boob. Yummers.

I think that it is socially quite healthy to speak (somewhat) openly about sexual things. I'm not speaking of true crudeness... but there is nothing shameful about it and it shouldn't be treated as such.

It's actually something that I regret. I was vehemently opposed to having anything creative done for my bachelor party. Quite vocal about it. And my groomsmen respected my wishes. We played ball hockey, ate wings... and it was great. But there was something kinda uppity and religious in my mind that I didn't realize at the time... and never sat totally right. A healthy dose of public humiliation could have cured that methinks.

This is far from a simple issue in the Big C church, because not everyone is deals at the same place of freedom. We also all have our issues that we feel "liberated" in... and they're not always the same areas! The last thing A CHURCH would want to be is lewd or a stumbling block to others. But this is simply not even much of an issue for younger Christians. To them, many of the church's seemingly ludicris hangups, are simply ignored.

But to make this happen... you NEED the authority of the AUTHORITIES. If your church leadership isn't in support of the "edginess" it could create issues... for you, them, and even the groom who you're trying to bless. Brian is a terrific leader and sees the value in something like this (he brought the rope!)... and it's because of him that church got to share in something fun in Matt's life. Saying "no" would drop a line of divide, saying "I can't enjoy everything that God provided for me at the church. I have to get it elsewhere".

See... The Church, should be into "Total Life Prosperity". There is no reason why the church should not embrace even something as juvenile as a bachelor party. It's a fun thing. It strengthens friendship. It embraces even the sexual "celebration" that the groom is about to embark on. It let's men be men for a night ... before the pink floating candles and the lacy white table clothes take over again.


Eric said...

"Does it tingle on contact"?

shamus goldensteinbergbaum said...

As an established artist, I am very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, underwhelmed by your website's art and content. I have filed a motion with the internet to have it removed due to its crass and juvenile nature.

Dave Carrol said...

hahaha... well thank Shamus

Hey do you host Canada AM?

You're dreamy if you do.

shamus goldensteinbergbaum said...

Please do not sass me. The medium of radio is entirely too small to hold all my artistic abilities. I'm not just a voice, I am a movement. Part of the movement is, attacking and vilifying people who give art a bad name. It was my duty to attack this web page. Art deserves better and so do you. In time you will view this message as guidance. You will realize a respected voice in the worldwide city-state of art bequeathed some insight to you. Sometimes hearing and truly understanding a criticism is the best lesson a person can learn. Unfortunately, the motion I filed with internet had passed the review stage and is now being processed.

Notes from the Tall, Dutch Guy said...

Shamus?!.... wow, i feel honoured to be graced with your internet presence.

shamus goldensteinbergbaum said...

As you should, as you should. I'm actually a big fan of the Dutch people. They have produced legendary art. If you would like to purchase any of my work, please forward me your personal information .so, we can work out the particulars. Once again, thank you for your adoration.

Matt Vaandering said...


The Bean Bag Chair said...

how did this get from a bachelor party to art?!!!
bring on the unstrip show!!!

Valorosa said...

I was wondering Dave ...
From a woman's point of view I liked your decription of your style at your first bachelor party. It seemed more respectful toward women and toward your very personal and private relationship with your wife.

Just my feel for the things you have said here... :-)

Dave Carrol said...

Hi Valorosa... and you know what? That's one of the reason's why I had the party that I did. In fact, at the time, my wife and I could barely speak about sex to each other, let alone make it bring aspects of it into the open with others. It was hard to separate "sex" and the "dirty" aspects of it.

And so, I would alway err on the side of respect and caution. If it was something that would be hurtful to a bride... I would never do it either. If it wouldn't be something that would be an encouragement to the groom... I wouldn't do it either. But in this case... it was a natural follow up to even some of the things that the groom and I had been chatting about philosophically.

I just think that the Church has banished (and therefore punished) the male "desire" to some extent instead of celebrating it as something that God created and said is good. It's been labeled dirty and I find that to be quite wrong.

But I TOTALLY get where you're coming from. It's only been because God's brought my wife and I down this road for a number of years that I even feel free to WRITE about the idea... and nothing is done without her consent and knowledge and her being totally comfortable.

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