Writer, Church leader, Eccentric Nut, Marketer

I'm Church Leader, Writer, Speaker, Marketer, Kindness Project Founder, Broadcaster and Superhero. But most important I'm a Husband, Father and a worshiper of Jesus.

25 July 2008

It's THAT time of the month...

... where I take a look at the best, wackiest, rudest, oddest... Google searches that found Big Ear!

You thought I was talking about my period didn't you? With the ovaries and the eggs and all? No no friend. I DO NOT have a single fallopian tube in my (as Steve Martin would say) "special purpose". Silly Blog reader.

Quite a collection this month if I do say so myself. Little bit blue this time... but that's how I roll eh.

Oh man oh man oh man... Steve Miller is gonna be PISSED when he sees this. And you know how he can be when his lyrics get botched. I know he loves me... that's why he has to hit.

That will be fun at holidays. At least you'll be able to find common ground with "Pork Disdain"

Not a bad idea. But for no more than 40 days OK? Then go back to porn. Actually... don't go back to porn.

Depends. The Female has a number of fun uses. Both practical and "otherwise". Rrrrow! The Male nipple however is very simple. It sits on my chest and gets covered in hair. Yum.

Thank you Alex... The question is "Who are two people who would have nothing to talk about?".

I don't think I have one of those. I mean these... I mean... the picture, the picture. Wait a second... do YOU have a picture?

Is that like the official term of what the Beverly Hillbillies were?

"A hat. It combines the spirit of old Mexico with a little big city panache. I like to call it the Urban Sombrero."
Elaine Benes

Oh I don't think you meant to search for that. Like... I know he has many gold gloves and all but...

Oh don't you tell me that there was a racist remark on Market Street! I won't hear of such nonsense. In April you say? Rubbish.

I think that was a Wesley wasn't it?

No no silly. Melons ARE Viagra. Remember?

They may be in my bathroom... but they WILL NOT be drinking any Red Red Wine on the new carpet. I don't know what that means.

I don't know about Starbucks... but I always suspected Juan Valdez. Let's start an Internet rumor... OK?


No really...


I'm afraid of you sir. Or Mame? (Gagging a bit)

If I was ever going to get an Aislin tattoo... it would be this one. She's my princess eh.


FearandParentinginLasVegas said...

That's Ha-larious! I just checked mine and these came up:
"britney spears vagina"
"im sorry sorry sorry, don`t worry worry"

I'm not sure they're connected and frankly, I don't want to know.

Mike said...

Too funny. You rock.

Anonymous said...

"melons are viagra"


Jeff said...

It's funny how like six or seven are in some way related to sex and/or nudity....

porn, nipples, penises, naked, viagra, homosexual, penis erection....what kind of site you runnin here, Dave? lol

Black Hockey Jesus said...

This inspired me to go check mine. Here's one:

"want see big vagaina in the world".

Who doesn't, dave carroll?

Dave Carrol said...

Well Mr Black Hockey Jesus sir...

(BTW i believe the origional black hockey jesus was pokey "dang I'm the only brother in the rink" Reddick)

you really should make the blog search words a part of your regular rotation... it's the best time of the month

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