Writer, Church leader, Eccentric Nut, Marketer

I'm Church Leader, Writer, Speaker, Marketer, Kindness Project Founder, Broadcaster and Superhero. But most important I'm a Husband, Father and a worshiper of Jesus.

30 August 2008

The Meek


This verse keeps echoing my mind.

Matthew 5:5
Blessed are meek, for they will inherit the earth

I'm preaching about it tomorrow at church... but I'm still trying to wrap my mind around just how and why the meek inherit the earth. Quite a subversive, powerful thought really. The whole Beatitude speech was! It's almost hard to justify in our minds. Remember this scene from "The Life of Brian" as the crowd tries understand what Jesus is talking about?

MAN #1:
I think it was 'Blessed are the cheesemakers.'
MRS. GREGORY:
Ahh, what's so special about the cheesemakers?
GREGORY:
Well, obviously, this is not meant to be taken literally. It refers to any manufacturers of dairy products.
MAN #2:
You hear that? Blessed are the Greek.
GREGORY:
The Greek?
MAN #2:
Mmm. Well, apparently, he's going to inherit the earth.
MRS. BIG NOSE:
Oh, it's the meek! Blessed are the meek! Oh, that's nice, isn't it? I'm glad they're getting something, 'cause they have a hell of a time.
The meek inherit the earth eh? Hmmm...

28 August 2008

Maybe the Government doesn't read much Malachi


I got a lovely, personalized, handwritten letter on flowered notepaper from my dear friend "THE GOVERNMENT" last week. OK so it maybe it was a generic, "Dear Mr. D Carrol" letter from Revenue Canada digging into my taxes. Same deal.

The Government is making me prove that I actually gave what I claimed to give last year! Isn't that awesome? I've fallen into the "that CAN'T be right" irregularly file! In fact... when I got the letter telling me how much I had to prove I gave in 2007... I even wanted to double check to make sure those numbers were right.

I got the calculator out and started running percentages compared to our income and almost had a heart attack! To be honest I panicked a bit initially, wondering how we keep tunafish in the cupboards! Ha. The first thing that dropped into my mind was that... "this faith life I've chosen to live better have a good retirement plan". Thankfully it does... but still makes you gulp deep sometimes.

I debated writing this blog because I don't want to come off as tooting my own horn. But giving has been a stretching process for me and it's SUCH an integral part of the faith life. We believe without apology in tithing... AND giving... AND offerings. We tithe to Freedom House. We give to other charities like Compassion Canada. We also are prepared to give extra when God leads. We've chosen to be people who are, as our pastor Brian Beattie says "generous on all occasions".

In fact one of Freedom House's core values is...

"Extravagant Giving. In all areas of life (time/talent/treasures) we will exemplify the character of our extravagantly giving God"
freedomhouse.ca


Think about that. God LAVISHES on us. If the only thing He did for us was give us Jesus. It would be extravagant. But He doesn't stop there. I believe that without living a lifestyle of generosity with our time, our talent and our money... we can't really properly interact with God. Not only because we "get Him" a little more, but it also positions us to receive as well. Being "suspiciously generous" means I KNOW that I can't get by without God's hand. God gave man everything we need (access to the Kingdom's wealth) and then commissioned us to take care of this world. But it's only through being submissiveness that we get the keys to the gate.

I've been thinking a lot about Matthew 5:5 where Jesus says...

"Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth"
Jesus


Meekness gets a bad rap. It sometimes seems to be a missing personally trait in those who influence the world the most. But listen to some of the meek definitions


1. humble in spirit or manner
2. Overly submissive or compliant
3. Showing patience and humility
4. Easily imposed on.

If you say the words, "In response to God I'm..." before any of those statements, they are desirable qualities. The more you walk the path of the being generous on every occasion... you (almost without realizing it's happening) become molded into someone who will respond to people's need without thinking twice about your own well-being. Because MY well-being is entirely dependent on God being God.

It's a cliche... but it's true. You can never out-give God.

27 August 2008

You Goggled WHAT and found me??


It's the most wonderful time of the month. Time for "You Goggled WHAT and found me?" I got some beauties this month, so let's do the top 20 shall we?

1. "Olympic wedgie"

This was BY FAR the most Googled thing on my blog this month. I believe I received an Olympic wedgie just outside of the tech wing at North Park in week 2 of Grade 9.

I can tell you that I wasn't doing cartwheels after

2. "doug factor"

He was running late that night... but what no one accounted for was the (dun dun dah) doug factor! I have no idea what that means.

3. "an oak tree fell on our house"

We should start a support group. I'll bring the scones.

4. "brantford ont jeepers used"

Is this becoming our "rep"? Yeah in Brantford they all say jeepers. Are we like Shelbyville to your Springfield?

5. "Billy Connolly long nasal hair"

Let's check...


It appears that he does. Next.

6. "carved pumpkin bride groom"

What a glorious ceremony it was as the Great Pumpkin finally married Linus... who was wearing only a blanket.

&. "Dave Carrol gay?"

Shut up Ernie... i told you not to say anything. I was planning on selling my story to Vogue.

8. "do gymnasts ever get photographed nude"

I don't know about gymnasts but there was a couple of people engaged in "acts" without clothes on being photographed on our beach at about 1pm in Punta Cana. Ask my wife about that story. She tells it VERY passionately.

9. "frank caliendo nude"

Yucky. He's not nude in this clip... but anyone who can go on a rant about Kim Jong Il as Charles Barkley is OK in my books



10. "how do you tell a christian missionary you think there lazy bums"

Ummm... I wouldn't tell him that. That's a tough conversation to have. "As if the throng of angry Pygmies resisting conversion aren't enough... my friend thinks I'm lazy. Dang it."

11. "i wanna taste the salt of your skin"

Ernie... I told you NO

12. "melon et érections"

i love the extra touch of class the accent aigue gives on the word erections.

13. "oak trees + john Lennon"

HE didn't make that tree fall on my house did he? DID HE?
LENNONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!

14. "play online -download adventure game +talk use find -battle -action -downloads -buy -multiplayer"

I'm not sure we can be friends

15. "pre-victorian spanking"

Things were way different back then. It's where the term, "going medieval on your as* came from. Hard core baby. Show them kiddies.

16. "reason why a person with a big ears will have a long life"

There are so many... but the main one is because they are stunningly handsome. And Charming. And Verile.

17 and 18: In the gibberish category we have "rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr" and "shoooooo bop bop"

Right back at ya folks

19. "starbucks boob"

Did they make some menu additions while I was out of the country? I know they are trying to pep up their brand but wow!

20. "testicle souvenirs"

I don't know where you're traveling too... but I'm not carpooling with you.


26 August 2008

When bearded Austrailians who fake cancer get swallowed by whales... TONIGHT on FOX


It's been a banner few weeks in Christendom. Actually... Christendom's been fine. It's just the celebrities who are having some issues. It's SO exciting to have the "Big C" Church bulletin look like tabloid isn't it?

You've likely seen this headline:

"Porn pastor who faked cancer tells of his addiction"

It's the story of Michael Guglielmucci, an Australian pastor who wrote the song "Healer". It's a hugely popular worship song around the world right now. Michael tells the story of how it was born out a terminal cancer diagnosis in this clip...



... aaaaand then it turned out it was fake. So fake that Michael made the whole story up to cover up a raging porn addiction that was so fierce it actually ravaged his physical body. Neat eh?

So here's what came to mind. Jonah 1: 14-17

Then they prayed to God, "O God! Don't let us drown because of this man's life, and don't blame us for his death. You are God. Do what you think is best."They took Jonah and threw him overboard. Immediately the sea was quieted down. The sailors were impressed, no longer terrified by the sea, but in awe of God. They worshiped God, offered a sacrifice, and made vows. Then God assigned a huge fish to swallow Jonah. Jonah was in the fish's belly three days and nights.


The NIV says that "God PROVIDED a great fish". I love the word "provided" or "assigned" in this text. It's a divine disaster sent by Grace. It's ludicrous to assume that this is the end of the "Healer" story. He screwed up pretty good. No doubt. It's just good that friends found out and stepped in. But like the Todd Bentley story there is more to this chapter than... "another crooked Christian". Way more.

"I've been hiding who I am for so long. ``I can honestly say to you that the last two years have been hell for me physically, emotionally, but I never sat down and said ... let's try and fool the world.''
Michael Guglielmucci

*** Disclaimer: None of this is an excuse for his actions and I have no problem with his church taking him out of public ministry so he can be healed and restored***

It's hard to be a Christian in the spotlight. REALLY hard. One of the many reasons is that Christian Congregations want a Leno... not a Letterman. Let me explain. I have just finished reading a very funny and sharp piece of Christian fiction... my first actually! (No... I just couldn't bring myself to read the Left Behinds... sorry Mr Peretti sir).

The book is called "The Almost True Story of Ryan Fisher" by Rob Stennett. It tells the story of a guy who was a failing real estate salesman who fakes being a Christian to sell real estate to Christians because they are nice, easy to influence people. He finds out he's so good at it, that he decides he could be powerful Pastor because of how persuasive he is... partnered with the fact that Christians follow a well defined script. He does similar manipulative things to what Michael G did... like fake websites to establish credibility. Ryan Fisher becomes so huge that he even goes on Oprah.

One Ryan's "revelations" about how to get Christians to follow him was that... church is just like a talk show. And Christians like Leno better than Letterman. Leno is nice to his guests... even sucks up to them, telling them what they want to hear. Letterman does everything with a sarcastic edge. He even has the reputation of mocking guests who are full of crap. When Ryan was Leno... things went smoothly. Anything too harsh didn't "play well"... even though it might be truth.

Michael Guglielmucci had issues and ran from God like Jonah. Churches don't like to hear the nitty gritty dirt of their celebrities. It's a Leno culture of niceties and "Praise the Lord Brother Michael"'s that make it excruciatingly hard to expose your sin as a leader. But God (as he commonly does) has provided a whale for Michael. This divine disaster sent by Grace.

"Healer" is still a great song, written by a guy in serious pain crying out for help... just not for the reasons he told you. Read the Psalms. That's what David did (aside from the lying part). Here's the formula for most Psalm's

V 1-6: "Holy Crap God... I'm in some serious trouble! Where ARE you??"
V 7-14: "Oh yeah that's right... I remember how you helped me before"
V 15-20: "OH MY GOD HOW GREAT YOU ARE... FREEEEEDOM! (shouted like William Wallace)


It will be exciting to hear how God heals Michael because he's now choosing to do it God's way. It will take this song to deeper depths of beauty. A Redemption Song.

25 August 2008

Reality Hopping

Well I'm back from the Dominican Republic. Didn't get to bed last night until almost 2am, then up off to work first thing in the morning. Haven't had the time to process our hundreds of pics yet but I'm sure I will soon.

A plethora of thoughts rolled through my mind while sitting in the sun (some reruns and some freshies). This was my first time at an all inclusive resort. It was lovely, relaxing, and easy living... but it's like Groundhog day. If we had had an alarm clock in our room, I'm sure that every morning "I've got you babe" would have greeted us.

You can bank on the fact that what is happening at the Ocean Blue Resort in Punta Cana right now is the same as what happened yesterday. Right now someone in a blue shirt is leading an awkward aqua-aerobics class. Right now there is a man walking around with a parrot on his shoulder and glittered pink sunglasses shouting "Hola senior". Right now there are tanned, wet, people piling multi-colored nachos on plate from the all-you-can-eat nacho bar on the beach.

It's an artificially created reality... but a reality none the less.

There are so many "realities" going on this planet right now. This is what I was thinking about as I watched the sun set from above the clouds over the Atlantic Ocean last night. I woke up in one reality... and went to sleep in another. Airplanes are like a little time machine transporting from one reality to another. What an age we live in, that as a 31 year old... I can say that I've experienced "realities" in Africa, Asia, The Caribbean and North America.

Maybe air travel shouldn't so shocking to me. But being able to see the world and experience different realities is VERY new to mankind. For much of time... we've had our place, our lot in life dictated to us by our place of birth. I haven't processed our pictures yet but we traveled up into the mountains and toured coffee plantations and cigar rolling shacks where generations were born, lived, did the same thing as their dad, and died.

But these days... things are different. If you want to, you can come down the mountain and leave. One guy who I made friends with told me that there are 9 million Dominicans on the island... and 1 million in the USA. That's A LOT! It says a lot too... I'm just not entirely sure WHAT it says yet when you consider how new "reality hopping" is. I'm not sure it's impact on how the "collective we" think has fully manifested itself yet. I think it's good. I think.

24 August 2008

Best of Big Ear: Freedom Lodge


Get free... live free... free others. That's the story morning glory

Freedom Lodge

Freedom is a language that I didn’t used to speak.
It was an unrhymed line.
An illusive metaphor.

Being alone is cold. DARN COLD boss.
It’s the bleak mid-winter that didn’t start out that way.
It once was a tasty exotic fruit.
Then it got dark…darker than I thought it would be.
Bare isolation on a campsite where the fire had long since gone out, yet I was left sitting like a fool on my lawn chair surprised; expecting no one to rekindle what I thought I had.

Then I saw the lights go on.
How could I have missed the toasty lodge with their tasty lodge pies in the oven.
Come to think of it, I did hear their laughter.
But I was suspicious; figured it was a stupid joke away.
Me and my tree is all I need.

You know how creepy I must have seemed peeking in the windows of Freedom Lodge?
What must have those playing snakes and ladders by the fire thought of me?
Of course… my face was one of a thousand peekers.
I looked back at me and my tree; there were some good times weren’t there?
Walden thought so.
I wonder if Walden got lonely when he heard the “whoops” of Freedom Lodge?
Who is Walden and why should I care what He and His tree thought???

The door handle of Freedom Lodge is big. Oversized… almost excessive.
Who carved this thing??? I couldn’t have done that!
The door is quite unlocked indeed. Who are these freaks? This is BIG lodge. It must have surround sound systems, WI’s aplenty; think you should lock’er up?

The warmth in this lodge is ethereal almost.
Before I could get out my pen to record my thoughts, I’m on a sofa with a hot chocolate in hand.
Little white marshmallow half dissolved. How did you know?
]There is a gorgeous girl coming to sit by my side.
Hope I don’t stink.
She’s got some of the widest bell bottomed pants than I’ve ever seen and a smile to match.
Do people like this actually exist? I’ve read about them.
“She’s no tree” I say in that sarcastic place I hope to soon muzzle.

What is this feeling I can hear buzzing in the room.
Is it a bird?
Is it a plane?
Clearly not.
The buzz smells like cinnamon.
It tastes like Christmas morning.
It floats like a hospitable host, proud of the home He’s prepared for his good friends.

I shouldn’t feel like I belong. But I seem to.
My name’s already over my feathered bed.
Pillow puffed the way I like it.
My tree is screaming muted hooks of the past in my ear.
No can do.
Tonight I take my shoes, AND SOCKS off.
I’m waking up to the Freedom Lodge breakfast buffet this chick keeps raving about.
I’d call this place rare, but it’s somehow not.
Tomorrow I’m going skiing.
Taking a break from me… sitting awhile…

DC



I get back from the Dominican tonight... so we'll chat soon!

23 August 2008

Best of Big Ear: The New World



The next couple of days I'm going to repost a couple of half prophetic... half poetic... half fact... half fiction... half dream... half real... pieces that I wrote while locked in a 24/7 Prayer Room.

The New World

The view from the plateau is both imposing and wondrous. It can feel as if you are peering over a rocky cliff into the New World like a child spying quietly from a hiding place. The Old World carries on obliviously behind you. It’s full of familiar sights, smells, and friends that you know intimately. They’ve been there for you, and you for them. It’s filled with tangible treasure. Some earned… some not. You know the Old World. It’s ins… and it’s outs. You know how that world will shout when it’s prodded and how far it can be pushed with cracking. Manipulation of the old world now comes easy. To some, it’s prime, fresh real estate to be conquered and subdued. But to your eyes, its sheen has faded into the grey mist.

Nothing is sure about the New World ahead. Its expanse is alarming. From my vantage point, only the gateway is visible to eye… and even that is a blur. But it’s vibrant! To even think about it, causes your entire being throb like a late-round fighter. It has the sensation of danger; but you know who goes before you. Over the mountains, you are assured of a warm refuge from whatever comes your way. Do you dare set your foot in virgin soil? Will support present itself when the territory is so foreign? Will others follow… and would it matter if they did? What will the Old World gossip be, when someone of your simple pedigree set's out on a path not yet carved?

It’s a task, a quest, a thrill ride, but holds in its hands an unwavering compass for the invisible map drawn for one. The New World is an ancient country full of lore and enticing mystery. It’s a land that has been inhabited by many; yet in my moment of decision, it’s a blank canvass screaming aloud for a design... that only my dreams can see.

What I once knew as home is no longer filled with music. The sounds life, the odor of freshly baked bread, and the prosperity that was once in abundance, left my four walls vacant… lamentably, long before I packed my own bag. There is nothing left for me there.

Today is declaration day. This new terrain deserves the forward motion that requires two feet. “Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord. He is trampling out the vintage where the grapes of wrath are stored. He hath loosed the fateful lightning of His terrible swift sword. His truth is marching on.” With boldness, subjection and righteous fear, I forge onward in the presence of King.

Dave Carrol
May 25th, 2006

22 August 2008

Best of Big Ear: These are my "those were the days"



I wrote this the day after having my best friends and mentors dedicate all 3 of our kids. It was a really memorable day. (Today is our 10th anniversary BTW! Since I wrote this last Friday... I'm predicting that right now I'm sitting by the ocean... doing nothing... ahhhh...)

These days are my "Those were the days"

These are my "those were the days"

The first fruits of a laden orchard.

My future is bright. It's so bright.
There is nothing but sun on the path I'm headstrong down.
Shadows only look like shadows if I allow them to.

These are my "those were the days"

I'll see these days with brightly tinted goggles of time.
I'll see my children grow; the shrieks that ring so loud now will be distant whispers.
I'll see my church launch into new lands; the color of growth-aches that rob sleep will have faded.
I'll see my city construct the tools of maturity; the street-fight wounds will have long scabbed over.

These days are my "those were the days".

Days that are fond.
Days that are nervous and teetering.
Days that are illusive to hold in my hand.

Days that are on a full court press for scrutiny before the jury of time decrees.
The day of rest is dependent on "those were the days".
THAT day... I'll sit in the sun and spin about "those" days

21 August 2008

Best of Big Ear: The Church needs to come out of the closet



This was a fun one talking about a gay prof I had in college and the church's destructive response to homosexuality


The church needs to come out of the closet

When I was in college, one of the electives I choose (for whatever reason) was called "Social deviance". One of the topics we discussed was Homosexuality. We proceeded to discover that our professor was a gay rights activist that would not let anyone with a contrary opinion to his speak. By the end of the class, security guards were brought into class so that Christians were not allowed to speak. This is 100% true with no exaggeration. Once "Rick" discovered that I was a Christian, I could not even hand in a paper to him without him backing away in fear. He would not get within a 10 foot radius of me, even though I had been nothing but intentionally kind. I couldn't help but wonder, "What did the church do to hurt you this deep?"

But it doesn't take much searching into our "holy closet full of skeletons" to find the answer. We treat homosexuality with contempt, outrage, and harsh harsh judgment. It is just plain DISGRACEFUL that the church is this guilty in this area. I have news for you... We are dead wrong and owe many people a lot of apologies. Not because homosexuality is right or acceptable, but here's a sobering thought... In Romans, the other issues listed along with it are things like Jealousy, Discord, Selfishness, Envy. Ever had issues with those??? Yes??? Why??? Because you're a human and you'll be attacked in whatever area you are susceptible to. It doesn't matter to the devil if you live a life bound by Homosexuality or bound by ambition.


Even with the great and wonderful post modern church (sarcasm), Homosexuality is still so taboo, nearly all who struggle with it will never share it with brothers in Christ for fear that it will bring judgment. And this is likely a justified thought. How would you feel if you were in this position. We claim to be free from our sins while heaping judgment on others. It's prideful and it's wrong wrong wrong. Allow this to be spoken about without joking or shame. It will create a place where it can be another (in our long line of human struggles) burden to be shared by our Savior and his body, instead of a heavy, shame-filled, secret that is carried solely by so many.

20 August 2008

Best of Big Ear: I want to be in Ghana Today



I remember writing this on one of the frustrated about work/life/culture lunch hour drives. Ha! We've all had them.

I want to be in Ghana today


I went for a drive over my lunch hour and popped in a CD full of Ghanaian Gospel "Highlife" music that a friend brought me from Accra last year. The 30 degree sun and the equatorial rhythms brought me right back to one of my favorite places on earth. Today... I just wish I was there.

-I want to be shocked that Ghanaian music doesn't sound like Ladysmyth Black Mambazzo
-I want to drink an orange "Fanta" sitting in the sun
-I want big bowl of Fufu with goat meat in it and I want to eat it with my hands
-I want to drink water out of baggie
-I want to walk down the street and be called "Oh brunie" or the Ga version "Blufonyo"
-I want to feel the refreshing evening breeze that cooled the earth after a 35 degree day
-I want to eat a Ghanaian donut fried fresh from the marketplace
-I want to wear ugly flip flops but call them "Charlie Wate"
-I want to cheer the Black Stars in the World Cup
-I want to get stuck in traffic with nothing to do but soak up the tunes and have street vendors bidding on my hat
-I want to walk down the street and have people be KIND and say... get this... "Hello!"
-I want to hang with real men of God and not have to deal with piddly little North American egos and our stupid, self-created, and self inflicted North American issues that leave us impotent, running in circles and arrogant
-I want worship to be worship... done by all... with no professionalism at all. No record deals. No whining over chords and which song should be played.... JUST WORSHIP... FOR A LONG TIME...
-I want to see a chicken's head cut off in the Sunday school... just once
-I want to watch reruns of Silver Spoons, GI Joe, and catch up with Ezmeralda
-I want the spirit world to be seen instead of being lost in our hidden goulash of secrecy and denial
-I want to see huts on the Ocean again
-I want the feeling of a post work shower, and a morning washdown
-I want Kiliwilli for diner... and hot pepper stew on rice... and Fanyogo
-I want to be genuinely engaged by my surroundings
-I want to learn through success and not failure
-I want to be around people living real life and not soft, over-suckled tit drinkers frightened like a schoolgirl by anything less than climate controlled luxury

Ah... check it out... my first inappropriate for public consumption blog rant. Feels good. The reality is that I know where I'm called and who I'm called to for this season in my life. Ezekiel is the man. He was called to a "difficult people"... you know... his own people. He ate the scroll and found favor with God. I choose to do the same, because being in Ghana right now would be intentionally putting myself and family out from the blood covering... and I sure don't want to be there.... but I sure miss it and those who live there. So pressing on....

19 August 2008

The Best of Big Ear: Bits and Pieces




One of my fav's that had a great comment chat back on July 27th of 2006.

Bits and Pieces

Stop what you're doing and look down. Wait... that won't work. OK, get a mirror, and look behind you. Those are your buttocks. We all have them. Deep thoughts with Dave.

This thought occurred to me today as I drove to work after seeing girl, after girl, after girl, on the walking on the street with their little short shorts strutting their "stuff"... soaking up the all-too-short Canadian summer.

It's funny that we attempt to flaunt our body, since everyone is built with the very same bits and pieces. For some reason people feel like what WE have is even somewhat unique or special, when, it's the same bum, or breasts, or one-eyed trouser snake that BILLIONS of others have... it just happens to be growing on you.

There is line in the Train song, "Calling all Angels" that says...

"When children have to play inside so they don't disappear. And private eyes solve marriage lies cause we don't talk for years. And football teams are kissing Queens, and losing sight of having dreams; In a world that what we want is only what we want until it's ours"

I hate that the last line is true. But why else would infidelity be so, almost institutionalized in our culture. We're overbearing, ravenous, consumers of EVERYTHING. And once we get what we want, we're after something else... and human bodies fall into this category. They are beautiful and desirous things. We're built to be excited by them. They are awesome gifts that we get to present to our chosen partner for their pleasure. Becoming "one flesh and one spirit" is an overwhelming, powerful, spiritual experience. I'm a big fan personally.

But we always seem to want more. Follow this rabbit down the hole, and you'll find that when you give yourself over to this method of thinking, you'll never be satisfied. Because EVERYONE has these parts. I do... you do... your 85 year old grandfather has them... and thanks to the little blue pill... now he can still use them... Shudder.

We're addicted to the infatuation stage of relationships. How many love songs are about anniversary's??? They're all about first kisses, first dates, romantic tingles... Infatuation stuff.

Proverbs 5:

18 May your fountain be blessed,
and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.

19 A loving doe, a graceful deer,—
may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her love.

If I wanted to, I could choose to become sexually infatuated with another woman (not if I want to keep my testicles but theoretically). Even if I physically acted on my thoughts, I'd find that there is nothing on the other side I don't already have with my wife. Far less actually. With my wife, I also find security, friendship, support... along with the physical part of life that we were made to enjoy.

And just for free... when the church gets free enough to talk about sex, we might actually start understanding what it means to have a Savior who is our DESIROUS bridegroom. So quit squirming and get free!

18 August 2008

Best of Big Ear: 4 Stories



While I'm on vacation... I thought I would look back at some of my favorite blogs from the last couple of years.

4 Stories

Story 1:


6:20 am. I was hosting the morning show on Brantford's first Christian radio station in its infancy stage. While manually changing out of date Amy Grant CD's in a tiny sweat box of a booth, God spoke to me that it was time to begin having kids. He led me to Psalm 128:3 Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house; your sons will be like olive shoots around your table.

My wife had been ready for quite some time for kids (even though we were only mid 20's) but this was the first time that the thought had crossed my mind. While scared out of my mind, since I had literally never held a baby EVER!! We began to try to have our first child. The process reminded me of when I was about to propose to Krissy. We both new it was going to happen eventually, so ever day that went by and it didn't happen, she got more annoyed.

One morning I went to host the show and got home around 9:30am and a Passion CD was playing unusually loudly. Chris Tomlin was singing "all of you, is more than enough for me..." Krissy looks at me with tears in her eyes and said, "I'm pregnant". We cried, worshiped and prayed. Jared: Meaning Descendant

Story 2:


Things were not well at the radio station. Rumors about lack of funds permeated every good intention. At the same time, God led us to take a step of faith and release another Carrol into the world. We were giddy with excitement at the prospect of adding to the number in our home. I honestly don't remember the when and how we found out that Krissy was pregnant, because it was about that time that I showed up for work, only to find the doors locked.

We had just told our whole family about the baby when all of a sudden, there was no money for us to be paid, God asked us to give our car away to a stranger and while waiting for a bus, we lost the baby... all within a couple week span. The numb was stinging. But because we don't find our hope in this world, we went to church and worshiped to the song "Blessed be your Name". We sang the lyrics, "when the darkness closes in Lord, still I will sing..." We chose to believe it, and then were allowed to experience it.

It became the most humbling period of time in our lives. I would NOT trade it for anything

Story 3:


After month's of having no income, God provided to me a job working landscaping with a good friend for a couple of months. The first day I came home feeling like I was literally about to die (sitting behind a microphone for a living will do that to a dude!). Krissy and I, as undaunted reproducers, held on to God's promises about a fully house. I have always wanted a daughter. It began a teenager watching Field of Dreams as Ray Kinsella loving put his daughter Karen to bed. I thought... "I want to love a daughter that way". I want to look at a little girl so full of fatherly love... so that she new that nothing could harm her cause Daddy is there.

I was working out in our basement one evening during the "trying" period and God said, "I'm going to give you a daughter and she will be the apple of your eye". Now that's cool thing to hear. So I held on to it.

It was a rainy fall day, we were driving in the over sized Diesel truck, and I was damp through 3 layers of clothing. Packing it in for the day I borrowed my friend's cell phone to tell my wife that I would be home a little late. She seemed to be a little goofy/giddier that usual. "What's your deal?" I asked. "I'm pregnant" she nonchalantly said. I big smile came over my spirit. Aislin: Meaning vision

Story 4:


When my wife and I were dating, one of the first "getting to know you" things she shared with me was that she wanted 6 kids. We've haggled a bit, but when it comes to family, I've determined that God listens to her first. And that's not a joke, but to her it's one of those very Biblical "Desires of her heart". It's a key to her destiny. I want more that 2 kids... without even thinking... but when a mind begins to think... it thinks about money... space of the house... number of bedrooms... SANITY!

God spoke to Krissy this summer that it was time for #3. In fact, God's been speaking to us about this one for about 3 years. We know the sex, name, personality, part of the destiny... it's very exciting. I was apprehensive, even going as far as to say that I didn't want a 3rd until I was ready. Flesh arrogance. I "cycle" went by with me living in stubborn disobedience, when God finally confronted me. I met up with my family camping after work a few months ago and shared this news with my wife who gave me a bold, "I told you so" type reaction.

We knew the time is now... that the baby does not belong to us... and that it would not take long. We went away a few weeks ago on our first vacation in many years, with many of our family and friends joking about coming back pregnant. The joke was on them. God had already told Krissy that she was. We almost didn't even confirm it we were so sure. And God was right.
In April... little Carrol #3 will be here.

PS
She came... Brianna's now one and a bit.

17 August 2008

Buh Bye



While I'm in the 45 degree heat for a week... you should tune in next week for


same bat time... same bat channel

16 August 2008

Why do I like leaving the Great White North?

Because every time I get the chance to leave Canada, I learn more about it... and it refreshes my passion for it.

I'm convinced that there are things that you can only fully realize about your culture by leaving it. When I have friends who go away on missionary adventures (or even holidays) I try to get them to be culturally analytical. Make note of the things that are similar... and the things that are different. When you live in a culture-bubble... you, eat it, and breathe it and pass it through your lower intestine. You end up assuming that:

bubble = right

There are things that are universally human and there are things that are just our habits. Habits are expendable. But some things are bigger and are worth fighting for. The trick is in the identification of the absolutes.

I find it very refreshing to get our of system and our habits for a time. It's a generous serving of perspective that infuses the day to days of coming home with fresh motivation. I really REALLY dislike routine. I know some thrive on routine, but it drowns me. But we all live with a degree of routine in life so finding how to keep it fresh is vital. Taking a new look at our culture, and then knowing that what I'm doing is effectively spurring people on to "love and good deeds", makes all the difference to me.

I don't care for culture bubbles... but I'm passionate about my country.
When I leave it... I love it more.

15 August 2008

Face your manga

No Earl... face YOUR manga!
Oh wait.

My friend Paul did himself a cartooned up face at www.faceyourmanga.com today.

So I followed suit.


Dang... that's one attractive cartoon Dave. Although... there was no option for "large right ear". One can only dream of the day when that... even that... is possible. In Jesus name.

14 August 2008

I was 21

I wrote this a few years ago, but in all my excitement about going away on our vacation in... counter please





ahhh... I remembered last night that it's my 10th anniversary on the 22nd. Most silly birthdays and anniversarys don't mean that much to me. But this one does. I love that we'll have been married 10 years. Especially since "I was 21".


At 21 years old, I stood on a pink carpeted generic church platform, singing Great Big Sea shanties in head, trying to distract my mind from sweating. It's all I could think of doing while waiting for my bride to appear through the solid pine double doors.

There were dusty rose bows on the pews. Simple.
The nondescript church candelabras were hauled out of the storage closet/baptismal tank and topped out the usual wedding trappings. Lukey’s boat being paint green allowed me to stop from giving in to the combination of laughter and vomit that was struggling for premium position inside me. Thankfully for the immediate family in the front row, the raucous vocals of Alan Doyle won out.

An overwhelming moment. A good portion of me felt confident.

I assumed I was ready for the glorious martial life that lied ahead. I mean, we passed the Pentecostal Assemblies martial scan-tron test didn’t we?

I thought that I had grasped the magnitude of what I was doing. Many of the guests KNEW we were far too young and naive. I could hear the whispers. Some were not happy that they had to come to a wedding that was having its reception in a gym with no booze. I knew this and cared not. They were all getting Kaisers with ham it… so drink your orange drink and be happy!

My policy for the previous year had been, no matter how many episodes of “The Wedding Story” that I was forced to sit through… never give an opinion on a wedding dress.

Not a “that’s a nice neckline”… or a “what a stupid looking train”. Nothing.

The truth is that I think most wedding dresses look foolish. Enormous poofy explosions of lace and beads. And wedding makeup? Why is deep sea blue over top of the eye supposed to be attractive? I like my ladies looking like they’ve been in a hockey fight. And wedding hairdos? They all end up looking like an army of hornets have built a summer home in the bride's skull. Wear that to work on Monday and you would be a laughing stock, but today… “belissimo”.

I was “taking one for the team” and would, for all eternity, insist that the dress was a beautiful garment that was etched in my brain for all eternity.

Then I saw my bride.

And everything stopped.

Her appearance knocked me in the throat yet I didn’t really even see it.

If we didn’t have pictures taken, I couldn’t have told you what happened for the rest of the day. All I remember was sporting a goofy grin that I couldn’t shake.



Marriage is sloppy.

It’s messy.

It’s inexact.

It’s blood, sweat and tears.

It’s victory and it’s defeat.

It’s intensely secure and it's madningly repetitious

It's truly an adventure that you have the privilege of sharing with your best friend, lover, and mate.

You NEVER know what lies ahead. But when you walk there with her in one arm... and Him on the other... it's a tale that Tolkien couldn't pen.



13 August 2008

Dave wise talks through an article about Marital Sex on TV

Article: A new study says the boob tube is undermining traditional family values and creating a world where adultery and pre-marital sex are the new normal. The study by The Parents Television Council, titled "Happily Never After" finds that television broadcast networks depict sex within marriage as "either non-existent or burdensome while showing positive depictions of extra-marital or adulterous sexual relationships with alarming frequency."

Dave: This actually annoys me. The "my dumb old husband won't stop trying to get me in the sack" or "the ole' she hag that won't put out" characters are actually worse than the midgets who struggle with necrophilia in some ways. Because all marriages have sex issues that need tweaking... few midgets struggle with dead lust.

Article: "These study results suggest that many in Hollywood are actively seeking to undermine marriage by consistently showing it in a negative manner," said Tim Winter, president of the PTC, in a release. He goes on to say that in addition to its mostly negative portrayal of marriage, television has also become a stage for sexual expression that would have been unacceptable less than a generation ago.

Dave: Just a wee bit. Actually had to give up watching CSI a bunch of years ago. Not because of the gore... because of the episode where people dressed in mascot suits kept having sex with each other... then killing each other. Yuck.

Article: Those include, according to the survey, threesomes, partner swapping, pedophilia, necrophilia, bestiality and sex with prostitutes. Add to that depictions of strippers, references to masturbation and sex toys, and television has created the perfect storm to blast away the last remnants of family values in Hollywood, the report suggests.

Dave: Yeah there weren't too many Ricki and Lucy episodes based around vibrators. Just sayin.

Article: Winter said the phenomenon will undoubtedly influence the values of future generations. "Throughout much of the history of broadcast television, the networks adhered to a voluntary code of conduct which stipulated that respect should be maintained for the sanctity of marriage and the value of the home. Our report finds that not only are the boundaries no longer respected - they have been obliterated," Winter said.

Dave: Part of me agrees. Part thinks the term "sanctity of marriage" is overused by conservative nerds. It makes marriage sound too squeaky clean. How could those involved in something so saintly ever get it on... down and dirty like? Maybe that's why outside of marriage passionate sex portrayal is less a left wing conspiracy and more a result of our religious hangups about sex in the first place?

Article: Following are some of the key findings of the study across all networks:
  • Verbal references to non-marital sex outnumbered references to marital sex three to one.
  • Scenes depicting or implying sex between non married couples outnumbered by a ratio of four to one, scenes between married partners.
  • References to adultery outweighed by a ratio of two to one, references to marital sex.
Dave: Again... annoys me. First it tells me that (go figure) sex is an integral part of our daily lives. We have it... think about having it... plan parts of life around it. It's part of the human plot line, which is why TV talks about it. So married people need to talk more about it positively. Honestly. In this case (and in many cases)... art reflects life. Why? Because they are selling what entice people. And Christians are squeamish for no reason whatsoever.

Article: Following are some of the study's findings broken down by network:

  • ABC has the most references to marital sex, but many of them put it in a negative light, while almost all referenced to non-marital sex were positive or at worst, neutral.
  • In 46 hours of programming NBC has only one reference to marital sex while there were 11 references to non-marital sex and one reference to adultery.
  • Also on NBC, references to incest, pedophilia, bestiality, prostitution, transsexuals/transvestites, partner-swapping and necrophilia outnumbered references to marital sex 27 to one.
  • And a tally showed NBC's depictions of adults having sex with minors as equal in number to scenes implying or depicting sex between married partners.

Dave: So then... NBC is evil. Clearly.

Article: But Rob Salem, television critic for the Toronto Star, said the PTC is naive if it believes television has a role as an ambassador for family values."There's the expectation that television is some reflection of reality. Reality television isn't even a reflection of reality," Salem told CTV Newsnet."Have these people been living in a cave? I mean, pre-marital sex, extra-martial sex, it's not like this is new to television. It's been around for a while."

Dave: He's somewhat right. It's not a reflection of reality... but it's a pimped up version of mindsets that are enticing to the audience. If married people had the best sex then (oh wait... every study says that's true... we do)... so maybe we should just say it a bit louder and prouder.

Article: The study mentions the steamy "Grey's Anatomy", "Boston Legal" and "Desperate Housewives" as harmful to families, while the shows "Everybody Hates Chris" and "Friday Night Lights" are listed as depicting solid family values.

Dave: And now turn to the gospel of Chris Rock...

Article: But Salem said TV has always pushed the boundaries and is continuing that trend."The thing I find encouraging is a lot of these shows are going beyond that and reinforcing non-traditional families with single parents or same-sex parents," Salem said.

Dave: Like Ellen? Or Rosie?

Article: Winter, on the other hand, is calling for a return to more modest prime time programming. "Broadcasters, knowing television's ability to influence behavior, must exercise greater responsibility when handling sexual situations during primetime hours -- opting for less graphic visual content, and favoring storylines that don't celebrate promiscuity, glamorize criminality, or denigrate monogamy," he said.

"The American people need to hold the networks and their local broadcast affiliates accountable for pushing questionable content into their homes over the publicly owned broadcast airwaves."

Dave: I'm not sure that the people CAN hold a network accountable. How would that look? Picket signs? Angry Christian letters? Yeah... Christendom could use juuuuust a bit more of that!

But... you can get free, live free and free others from some of the trappings of the conservative mindset... then go shape the culture. Frankly, I like some sex stuff in sitcoms. It's part of our lives. There are some killer King of Queens episode about sex. We actually enjoy laughing about sex in our home. Go figure... sex... is fun.



12 August 2008

Creative Capitalism

I was getting my increasingly gray hairs cut over lunch and picked up a Time Magazine featuring an article by Bill Gates about "Creative Capitalism". It actually caught my eye because my friend Chris Jones blogged about it yesterday! He also blogged about me! Ha... he called me "a passionate person....big ears....big mouth....big heart..."

Just one ear Chris. The ears are lopsided... it's where the charm comes from.
Anywho...

People dump all over capitalism, and often it's very warranted. Capitalism, like democracy, like communism... is a man-made system... run by men...and therefore flawed. They all contain nuggets of good malfunctioning because of greed. BUT whether you like Windows or not, Bill Gates is doing good in this world. These are some things that stood out to me:

Creative capitalism isn't some big new economic theory. And it isn't a knock on capitalism itself. It is a way to answer a vital question: How can we most effectively spread the benefits of capitalism and the huge improvements in quality of life it can provide to people who have been left out?

Governments and nonprofit groups have an irreplaceable role in helping them, but it will take too long if they try to do it alone. It is mainly corporations that have the skills to make technological innovations work for the poor.

One study found that the poorest two-thirds of the world's population has some $5 trillion in purchasing power. A key reason market forces are slow to make an impact in developing countries is that we don't spend enough time studying the needs of those markets

There's another crucial benefit that accrues to businesses that do good work. They will find it easier to recruit and retain great employees. Young people today — all over the world — want to work for organizations that they can feel good about.
Bill Gates


In Chris's little blog blurb about me yesterday he said:

"Dave is working with a bunch of us in Ontario on a regional team here for 24-7 and spends most of his time dreaming about how to take over the world...in particular the City of God...according to him....Brantford!"


And it's true. I do think about world domination.
THIS is honestly my dream...

Sitting in front of a map of the world (like a Risk Game) with Billions of dollars in my pocket... strategizing how to feed everyone, build revolutionary infrastructure, facilitate the dreams of the storm weathered... and see many see and fear and put their trust in the Lord.

That's my dream. And some of the principles in this Creative Capitalism article open the doors to this. This is why a "business anointing" is SO vital for our earth. Christians with money with vision. Vision to invent... vision to create things AND WEALTH... and strategy about HOW AND WHERE to invest their money to help millions of people.

It's really so easy. Here's how Bono's Red campaign started...

"a few years ago I was sitting in a bar with Bono, and frankly, I thought he was a little nuts. It was late, we'd had a few drinks, and Bono was all fired up over a scheme to get companies to help tackle global poverty and disease. He kept dialing the private numbers of top executives and thrusting his cell phone at me to hear their sleepy yet enthusiastic replies. As crazy as it seemed that night, Bono's persistence soon gave birth to the (RED) campaign. Today companies like Gap, Hallmark and Dell sell (RED)-branded products and donate a portion of their profits to fight AIDS. (Microsoft recently signed up too.) It's a great thing: the companies make a difference while adding to their bottom line, consumers get to show their support for a good cause, and — most important — lives are saved. In the past year and a half, (RED) has generated $100 million for the Global Fund to Fight AIDS, Tuberculosis and Malaria, helping put nearly 80,000 people in poor countries on lifesaving drugs and helping more than 1.6 million get tested for HIV. That's creative capitalism at work."
Bill Gates


Want to know why this excites me? Because it's doable for the same reason why the infrastructure at the Beijing Olympics is so state of the art and excellent. Follow me here.

Because the government in China is quite totalitarian... they wanted new fantastic buildings and cars off the road... and had the authority to do it, so they did it. There wasn't an opposition saying they couldn't. Now... obviously there are downfalls to this set up, but when it came to accomplishing a specific goal... they wanted to, and had the means to... so it happened.

When A church wants to do something, it can an arduous political process to accomplish goal. That, combined with the fact that most churches struggle just to get by... little of social consequence gets done. It's one of the reason's why big giving, generous business folks have a hard time tithing or even giving to churches. I don't think it's necessarily the right answer but it is what it is.

But with a "Creative Capitalist" who has the means and the vision to do something... and God captures their heart... Who's telling him no? Honestly... a few influential people with captured hearts could change the face of our world.

I believe this.
I pray for this...
...a lot.

11 August 2008

Krissy buys a patio set

It's how hot in the the Dominican?

Really?



See that's hot


Is it just me or do Olympic gymnasts kind of look like terriers?

With those little powerful legs and all. Running and jumping and springing and such. Come on... I can't be the first person to think that.

And honestly... is there an Olympic rule about not picking your wedgie? Swimmers, volleyball players, gymnast people... I'm looking in your direction.

10 August 2008

Two of the funnier things I've seen in a while

Cat herding... it's just what you think.



A "Font Conference"



Wide Latin is my fav. That reminded me of my first ever blog post in April 06... ranting about Comic Sans and Wing dings. "Mailbox! Mailbox!"

I love it when people put a high amount of production into completely pointless things. Them's me people.

8 August 2008

I'm a sucker for the Olympics

Of course no body cares about skeet shooting or ping pong or kayaking except skeeters or pongers or kayakers... we all get that. But something about the Olympics is really cool.

On one hand, it's not the bringer of world peace and unity that the spinners and salesmen will try and sell you with a side of fries...

but on the other hand... it has traces of something Holy that we rarely touch. It really does. I often think of Psalm 133...

1Behold, how good and how pleasant it is
For brothers to dwell together in unity!

2It is like the precious oil upon the head,
Coming down upon the beard,
Even Aaron's beard,
Coming down upon the edge of his robes.
3It is like the dew of Hermon
Coming down upon the mountains of Zion;
For there the LORD commanded the blessing--life


There is a commanded blessing when you do something in unity. It's powerful. And that many people who are so culturally different coming together in the name of ONE THING... gets me.

My favorite Olympic memory was the opening ceremonies of Sydney in 2000. Krissy and I were in Ghana. We woke up on what must have been the only Saturday morning that we had nothing to get up and do for in 7 months. It was an oddly cool, comfortable, breezy morning so we lay in bed all morning, watching the celebration of culture... the parade of nations... Muhammad Ali light the torch... all while we listened to the sounds of the West African morning outside our window.

I remember the feeling of being a part of a larger community. A global community. I remember actually feeling what the Olympic spin doctors try to sell. And it sells and sells and sells. Advertisers clamor to put their brand on the Olympics because there is something unusually pureISH there.

My sister-in-law (of whom I am EXTREMELY proud) is leading a team at the "Bring Me Hope Summer Camp" in Xin Zheng China right now. It's a camp giving Chinese kids a chance to be kids. I can't wait to hear her stories. Here's a clip from their camp last week...



We really are ONE.
You know that?


It's not a concept that a politician invented, a movement propagated or that the Olympics monopolize. The Olympics in practice... is a track meet. But it is the largest event on earth with the most different people doing ONE thing. It's a minor minor taste... a drip on honey on the lips... of something so pure that we'll one day live full on in.

Heaven will be a really wonderful place.
Really wonderful.


7 August 2008

A "Dave's Brain" Play by Play

Did you even realize that "blog" is short for web log? See... I did not know that. So today, seeing as how I'm actually really busy at work... I'm gonna (in 15 minute intervals or so) tell you the excruciating minutia of the thousand monkeys on a thousand typewriters that is my brain.

9:37

I'm tired. The dude I work with in my creative department is on holiday so I'm by myself in my office cave again today. In the last 2 days... I've written ads for 3 interior decorators and 3 women's clothing stores... i seem like the one who has his finger on THAT pulse don't I? And I have about a dozen more ads to write in the the next two days. Woot as the kids say. They all say woot.

9:42am

Wouldn't a thousand monkeys on a thousand typewriters be amazing? I'll bet you'd get ticks though. But it's all the bananas you can eat.

9:46am

As much as I never want to go to a Smooth Jazz show... I almost want to see WHO is at a Smooth Jazz show.

10:06am

Oh man I feel so dirty... I just participated in a "who's gonna win So you Think you can Dance" discussion.

OK so I think Twitch will win OK??? Leave me alone.

10:10

I sent 61 work emails yesterday. Yep. I did.

10:20

I think Sleep Country... while they might sell a soft mattress... schedules their radio ads in a very weird way. This information means absolutely nothing to you; I understand if you'd prefer to look away.


10:35

Uncle Stevie Harper sent this to my house
I like Uncle Stevie. But he needs a "pimp my PM" makeover... and I don't like that he's sending out stupid crap to homes when there's been no election called... calling young people "THUGS". I don't like that.

11:01

When you say to someone on the phone, "We have nothing available right now, but we'll definitely keep you in mind"... what you really mean is... "I'll forget your name as soon as I hang up the phone."

11:11

11:11... just sayin.

11:27

Wow... I just wrote an ad I actually like for a Pet Store. Doesn't happen that often.

(Sounding like a BBC documentary)

Gushy British Accent: Nigel Popplebottom reporting from ______ … today we learn golf tips from pets. When playing the fade into the wind, how much stance compensation should be made?

Cat: Meow

GBA: Well… what advantage would curling up a ball and purring be?
Cat: Meow meow

GBA: Oh pish posh a catnip ball wouldn’t carry half as far as…

Cat: (sassy) meow

GBA: Oh you win

Announcer: Pet’s from ________. Terrible golfers. Great friends. Come see their huge store and actually play with your new friend before taking them home.


11:48

Just had a great discussion about the ups and downs of polygamy. It think it would be hard since it's not really just a "not monogamous" relationship... it's a multi-committed relationship! Dang...
shall we pray for brother polygamist for a moment...

Dear Lord.
Give my polygamist brethren the ears to hear what their many angry wives are saying...

12:02

I think I'll have lunch and think about this...



1:47

Ahhhh... having meetings about church things is a smoothing brain oasis for me. No really. I love it. Not being sarcastic. My church rocks. And I ate chicken fingers.

2:06

Conversation #2 about so you think you can dance. When that judge starts on her "hot tamale train" I get panicked and hope that either her or me explode as soon as possible to make the pain stop.

On the plus side we also talked about Arrested Development... so I found my happy again.

"I blue myself Michael"
Tobias Funke

2:33

Home designer girl don't like my script? Oh well. I'm still thinking about Arrested Development. Happy happy happy. Remember Carl Weather's obsession with stew?



2:52

Just voiced an arts report, a Jazzfest, and some Sleep Country tags. I remember when being in a studio was a novelty. Actually... no I don't remember that.

3:10

Did you realize that it's been 20 years since Ben Johnson broke Canada's heart? Remember when he raced a horse for money?

3:32

I hate talking about money. Especially when there isn't enough. Actually ONLY because there isn't enough. My dream gig is to give away gob's of money to smart people with an honest desire to impact their communities for Jesus. I'll love talking about money then.

6:18

Well I picked up a tent from some friends as we're going to give camping one more go tomorrow night. This one will be way better for me... since I'm going to sleep at home and meet up with Krissy, my sister and the kids Saturday morning.

This doesn't look so good though...

6:33

I think my favorite Old Testament Laws to break are the ones about not eating pork.

7:06

As the Jays game gets under way... Jared and Aislin are giggle fighting over whether his name is AJ Burnett or AJ Burlett. Gold Jerry Gold.

Brianna? She's hitting my leg with a stick. Equally funny

8:18

I'm now eating leftover funeral cake. Mmmm...

8:25

I wonder if the Jets traded for Brett because so they could call themselves "Brett and the Jets". I wonder if anyone told Kid Rock that "things" and "things" aren't really good rhyming lyrics?

8:42

Krissy is at a friend's house who has young kids and are also subjected to hour after mindless hour of Dora The Explorer. She made me email them the link for THIS. If you know Miss Dora... you'll love Maraka



9:02

Was just reading Todd Cantelon's Blog (planted Freedomize church in TO and hosted FreeTV). He's starting a site called www.christiansex.ca. Check out this snippet from his blog about this site (which I don't think actually exists yet) where he recalls an interaction that happened during a councilling session...








You know what? I've had that exact conversation with Christians about to get married... freaked because they know nothing about what real sex is.

9:23

I don't know why... but the links on my blog have all mysteriously turned purple. Why blog gremlins? Are you still mad that that kid put a gremlin in a microwave back in the movie? That was a long time ago Gremlin. Get over it!!!

9:29

Oh wait... it fixed it. Sorry. it was formatting... not gremlins

could have sworn it was gremlins

10:25

Alright... that's it. I did or thought nothing for the last hour.

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