Writer, Church leader, Eccentric Nut, Marketer

I'm Church Leader, Writer, Speaker, Marketer, Kindness Project Founder, Broadcaster and Superhero. But most important I'm a Husband, Father and a worshiper of Jesus.

6 October 2008

Sex is like a square dance lesson.

My great aunt and uncle who are now the peppiest 80 year olds I know, spent most of their adult recreational time square dancing. As kids we would show up at their pot luck dance parties. My mom and dad would admire their moves from afar, while my brother and I snickered because we were far too cool to square dance. But every now and again... we'd all get pulled into the massive mob of plaid partners aswingin'. It was a flurry of arms, legs, and promenades. We had very little idea what we were doing but we got swept up in it... and it was kinda fun. Then after there was macaroni salad and Vernors after.

You know... kinda like sex.


Good sex... is NOT an achievable discipline that you will be able to stand on a mountain one day and say "Yes... I HAVE arrived!" It's more often like an awkward square dance lesson.

"What did that guy say he wants me to do? Wait a second... if she puts her hands up, where are mine supposed to go? What in the world is a dosado? I look like a mental patient over here... does this guy really think this looks good? Dang... this is kinda fun actually."

A good sex life means a big smile on two faces. And THAT is achieved different ways for different people. There is no "rule". There is nothing worse than cautiously suggesting,

"I have an idea. I'd kinda like to swing my partner to and fro... bow to the beau and bow to the belle... then promenade a little bit. You in?"
Only to hear,

"you're not right in the head sicko. We should clearly be squaring to our sets... tipping to the left and tipping to the right BEFORE any promenading is done. Sicko"

Don't you think there is room for swinging, bowing, squaring AND tipping before the big promenade. Sometimes (especially if you've been dancing for many years) we can forget that sex is fun. It's inexact and messy. It's a party. And it has macaroni salad and Vernors after.


dwaneparsons said...

You had me at macaroni salad and Vernors.

Anonymous said...

You just made me crack up until tears crawled themselves down my cheeks. Wow! I so needed that.

Thanks Dave!!

Heidi Reed

Mike said...

This is a great post. Funny too.

On the serious side we have put so much presure on ourselves to have "good sex" that the fun can be lost.

Dave Carrol said...

Sometimes the "bloopers" can be more memorable and connecting because of a shared funny experience than we expect it them to be

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