Writer, Church leader, Eccentric Nut, Marketer

I'm Church Leader, Writer, Speaker, Marketer, Kindness Project Founder, Broadcaster and Superhero. But most important I'm a Husband, Father and a worshiper of Jesus.

24 June 2009

You Googled WHAT and found me?


This month's real... honest... word for word... things that people Googled and wound up on my blog; and my sarcastic responses to them.


1. "women are not from venus"

After leaving the toilet seat up for the "final time" John Gray's wife made him rethink a few things.

2. "what are the important things to remember in broadcasting"

As a seasoned broadcaster, I can share with you that it's important to know that no actual money changes hands in broadcasting. You can help yourself to as many passes to Disney on Ice and the Wine and Cheese Show as you want though. In fact it's a good idea to do so. If you bring a big enough bag, you can take home a week's worth of cheese samples!

3. "we both are stubborn asses"

Oh... yes. You've reached stage 3 on the "Marriage Realization Chart". It goes like this...

  1. Honeymoon Bliss
  2. Holy Crap I'm living with a girl!
  3. We are both stubborn asses
Then somewhere around point 8 or 9 you realize that you'll be just fine. Forge on soldier.


4. "the lords prayer, cowboy version lyrics"

... the power and the glory.
For ever and ever.
Yehaw.

5. "the rainforest restaurant+brantford"

Oh I'm not sure you really want to eat there right now. It looks like this now.


But in 6 months or so I'd be happy to rent you a lovely apartment in the main dining room area!

6. reverendo lovejoy

El Reverendo Lovejoy español. Él es un predicador con picante latín fuego



7. "pontipines mormon"

I laughed out loud at this one. Every one of us who has been subjected to "In the Night Garden" has thought this and likely said it out loud.

8. "how to make the holie big in ear"

Warning... forthcoming rant: The HOLIE in the ear should not be bigger. Dear young dorks... stop stretching your earlobes to ridiculous proportions. You have a lot of life to live where

a) The hoop in your earlobe will look stupid
b) Taking the hoop out leaving a floppy, mangled, dangly,"Holie" in your ear... will look stupider.

9. "if i kissed someone with the swine flu do i get it to"

Yep... you're pretty much bacon. It's your own darn fault for making out with a pig in the first place.

10. "hide it under a bushel of what?"

Why have we never really asked this before? What does it matter I guess... just let your little light shine darn you.

11. "fear of wet paper towel"

Let us pray.

2 comments:

Cody said...

hey Canadian, i'm digging the face lift on your blog. did you do the work yourself?
i will definitely be stealing the light bulb service as well...and I will be asking my church family to get a prayer room! awesome stuff man!

Dave Carrol said...

Hey man... it's actually a template that I touched up here and there... thanks!

Prayer rooms are quite a cool thing. The 24/7 Prayer thing is a very powerful deal. I love it.

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